Sometimes it is difficult to pick ourselves up and find that happiness that seems so elusive. It is in these times, we need a happiness buddy, that other person who can add light to our world and bring laughter into the dark places of our thoughts.
I’m fortunate. In my lifetime, I’ve had many happiness buddies. With a happiness buddy, our conversations are full of discussion on how we can add to our individual lives and how we can add to the collective. We are genuinely involved with being there for one another when the need arises. This is not to say we never engage in bemoaning the woes of the world, but we’re more interested in finding creative ways of making life better. This is not to say we never kvetch. We do, but when we do we end up laughing about the absurdity of what we are kvetching about or finding something to say that brings cheer into the conversation.
A happiness buddy adds to our life, just as we add to their life. Our life is richer for their being a part of our life as our presence in their lives adds a depth and meaning. Our friendship is balanced, each feeling the other gives more. And that is key. If you feel you are always the one giving without receiving anything back, this is not a happiness buddy. That is a dependent relationship that will add to unhappiness.
Today reach out and ask someone to be your happiness buddy. This may be a difficult process for some of you, but it is such an important one. People who are unhappy tend to wait for the world to come to them, not realizing that happy people go out and make friends.
Certainly, this is an easier task for someone who is outgoing, but here are your options:
- You can continue doing what you are doing and continuing feeling what you are feeling, or
- You can make changes in your life.
You are the only one who can make changes in your life.
If you have one friend you are ready to go. If not, then you must cultivate and nurture a friendship by getting out and meeting someone who can be your happiness buddy.
What is a happiness buddy? Someone who will deeply listen to your complaining without comment, and then stop letting you make excuses for your unhappiness by reminding you the sun is shining, the day if full of promise, and life is ready to hand you all its wonders and all you need to do is receive.
Make a pact with your happiness buddy that when you start complaining or feeling sorry for yourself, this person will let you speak your mind, and then gently, but firmly, and with loving kindness, show you the way to laughter.
A happiness buddy may be more than one person; may even be a whole community, but there should be at least one person you can call on the phone or from whom you can receive a good, warm hug. A happiness buddy may not be a romantic partner and may not even be a close friend . . . yet they may.
Here’s the real treat to having a successful happiness buddy: The day is soon to come when you will be experiencing so much happiness in your life that you will be someone else’s happiness buddy and be able to show them the way to laughter and joy.