14 Ways to Change Fear-Based Emotions to Love-Based Emotions

Posted on May 20, 2024 by Diana Rankin

Depression is a serious problem in our world today. Fear and anger rule too many lives. But we don’t have to live in these fear-based emotions. We can live in love-based emotions.

Following are 14 ways to change fear-based emotions to love-based emotions. These will help heal the blues and other fear-based emotions and change anger, fear, frustration, worry, anxiety, etc. to love-based emotions of happiness, calm, self-love and love for others, fun, laughter, etc. 

You’ve probably noticed, and wondered why, I chose 14 ways to change fear to love. Why not 15? There’s a reason. Keep reading and I’ll reveal why, but first–

Important that you understand–

  • These methods will NOT help if you are clinically depressed.
  • If you are thinking of taking your life, call 988 if in US.
    • Keep that number handy. Reach out to someone, a friend, a relative, a therapist.I am not a therapist; I am apsychic-intuitivespiritual leaderpublic speaker, andseminar leader who has learned to live her best life and wants to help others live their best lives.I’m also a writer, with 6 books published, including Joy! The Art of Living a Happy Life, 52 practices to create happiness and break the addiction to unhappiness.
    • This book might help you. If you think it will, you can order it from Amazon, the link is on my website, www.dianarankin.com. Some of the processes aren’t in the book so save this article if you find it helpful.

3 things you need know for these methods to work–

  1. Make it simple. Every emotion is either fear-based or love based.
    • Fear-based emotions are anger, jealousy, frustration, impatience, anxiousness, depression, etc.
    • Love-based emotions are calmness, happiness, joy, caring, empathy, compassion, laughter, etc.
  2. Be aware of what you are feeling and acknowledge the emotion as coming from fear or love.
  3. You must want to be happy. That sounds silly. Doesn’t everyone want to be happy? Well…no. Sometimes it’s easier to stay in misery than do the work to be happy, or at least that’s what some people seem to think. But you’re not one of them. You want to be happy and are willing to put forth the effort. So–
    • Be aware of what you’re feeling. Once you know what you’re feeling, and decide it’s worth the work to be happy, you can then make the decision to change whatever the fear-based emotion is to a love emotion.
    • This is work that isn’t always easy, but it’s well worth the effort.

Here are the 14 ways to change fear-based emotions to love-based emotions:

  1. This is an easy way to exchange fear for love once you recognize you are experiencing a fear-based emotion. Every emotion is either fear-based or love based.
  • You’ll need 2 small items of different colors—stones, beads, pieces of paper, etc.
  • One represents fear-based emotions (red bead for example)
  • One represents love-based emotions (green bead for example)
  • When feeling anger or any fear-based emotion, hold the red bead in your hand; look at it, ask yourself questions. For example–
    • Am I angry at someone I love because they won’t listen to me?Does it help me to be angry?Do I get what I want when I’m angry?
    • What’s in it for me to be angry?  
  • Then look at the love bead, smile, and make a conscious choice to move to love, to calm.
  • This is also a good time to go deeper & work on healing an old pattern, ask yourself–
    • Why does this make me angry?
    • Do I feel unheard? Unseen? Unworthy of having an opinion?

2. Mountain top—a friend told me this years ago when I was down and out.

  • Hold your left palm up flat.
  • With your right fingers, climb up your left palm while imagining that left palm is a mountain.
  • Once you climb the mountain, you are at the top, simply flip over and you’re still at the top. Stay there on top for a while and enjoy your life.
  • Every mountain we climb gets easier…and seems smaller because every time we learn how to climb that emotional mountain, we have the skills to climb easier, so the mountain seems smaller and the climb easier.

3. Picture a cone because life is circular.

  • As we go around the circle of life, the circle gets smaller and easier. This is because, like the mountains we climb, everything we go through makes it easier when it’s presented to us again because we’ve learned how to get through. Plus, and this is a big plus, we’ve healed a lot of that emotional baggage and catch ourselves before we fall off the cliff into the fear-based emotion.
  • Remind yourself of this and soon you’ll start to notice this is true.

4. Mirror self-talk is when you look into a mirror and look, really look, at that person looking back at you.

  • As you look back at yourself, tell that person in the mirror how worthy and deserving they are of love. Tell them how important they are to life. Tell them they are beautiful, handsome…whatever they need to hear.
  • Depression and other fear-based emotions are a
    • lack of feeling worthy
    • lack of feeling deserving
    • lack of self-love
    • It’s time to change the narrative and give yourself loving self-talk.
    • This won’t be easy for some, but every day, at least once (twice is better) morning and evening, or whenever you feel down, give yourself a little mirror self-talk.

5. Share a tree’s energy.

  • Find a sturdy tall tree with deep roots such as an oak or hickory. Short-rooted trees, such as maples, are not the best for this process. Let your intuition guide you in this process. Trust yourself.
    • Ask permission to share the tree’s energy. Don’t worry if you feel the tree is saying no. It’s merely not healthy enough at this time to help you. Find another tree.
    • Hug the tree and feel its energy.
    • Then put your spine into the tree. You may feel/see your energy.
    • One side of your body may feel/look darker.
    • Feel/see your own energy changing to lighter energy. 
    • Then imagine your feet reaching into the ground with the tree’s roots—grounding yourself.
    • Now raise your arms and let yourself soar with tall the tree’s branches.
    • Know that you can soar and be grounded at the same time.

6. Self-talk in nature

  • Go for a walk and talk to yourself. If you can’t go for a walk, simply step outside and look around, look at the ground, look at the sky.
    • Ask those hard questions—
      • Why am I angry, fearful, worried, etc. Ask to be released from these emotions.Give any fear-based emotions to Mother Earth or Father Sky by asking and holding your hands in the direction of either Mother Earth or Father Sky, and then imagining the emotions flowing out of your hands.
    • Now dance. If you can’t dance, imagine yourself dancing with joy.
    • Tell yourself you are replacing this fear-based emotion with love.

7. Give the emotion a name and talk to it.

  • For example, Hank is my anger. As a girl I wasn’t allowed to express anger. As an adult, I had to learn what anger felt like. It was scary! So, I gave it a name, Hank, and promised to work with him if he promised to not body slam anyone.
    • We all get angry at times; we all experience fear-based emotions.
      • Recognize the emotion.
      • Name the emotion.
      • Then work with the emotion. Let it work for you, not against you.

8. Stare at a candle or an object.

  • Keep staring until the fear-based emotion passes.
    • Meditate if you can; if not, just keep staring at the candle until you relax and you’re able to deal the with emotion in a loving way.

9. Smile, simply start smiling.

  • Changing the muscles in your face helps the emotion to pass.
    • Then do the work—ask those questions.

10.  Laugh-yes you can-just start laughing, soon you’ll laugh at yourself.

 11. Journal or draw about the emotion until you’re able to understand it and release it.

  • Keep asking those questions and go deeper until you have the answer to what’s beneath the emotion.
    • For example: Do you feel heard? If not, do you feel worthy of being heard?
    • Write until you find the answer. You do know. If you think you don’t, write until you find it.

12. Write down an affirmation and carry it with you; paste it every place in your house where you will see it often.

Put it inside a cupboard, next to your computer, on your bathroom mirror, etc.

13. Repeat the words bless you and bless me. When that driver cuts you off and you want to show him a little finger language, instead of getting riled up, simply say bless you and bless me.

  • You may start through gritted teeth but keep saying bless you, bless me until you feel the change of energy. You might even start laughing.
    • Use this whenever someone gets under your skin and you find yourself in that quick-temper mode.

14. 3 breaths—When we breath we don’t give it a lot of thought, but when we do concentrate on the breath, it is in the stomach and chest areas. These 3 breaths engage all of you.

  • Take that 1st deep breath in and using your imaginal mind see, as well as feel, your chest and back expand—exhale and see/feel the breath leaving your body.
    • Take the 2nd breath. See and feel the breath move up into your head, filling your brain with the breath, then see the breath move into your feet. Exhale and see/feel breath leaving body.
    • Take the 3rd breath see and feel your sides expanding, expanding to the left and to the right with the breath. Exhale and see/feel breath leaving body.

Some of these processes are easier than others. Changing a fear-based emotion into one of love isn’t always easy. It does get easier (remember the cone) the more we choose love over fear.

This doesn’t mean we’ll never feel fear or anger or worry again. It means we don’t have to live there.

Now why 14 methods? In numerology 1 + 4 = 5, which is the number of freedom. So, my friends, it’s time to be free of those fear-based emotions and live more of your life in love.

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